The IF I COULD BE… meme

Arr! Shizzle me nizzle, I’ve been tagged again for another meme – this time by Simon….

Arr! Simon! I’ll get you for this! I’ll GET YOOOOOUUUU!! (echo: you, you, you,…. fade to silence.)

What follows is a list of different occupations.
The reader must select at least five of them.
The reader may add more if they like to the list before they pass it on (after the reader select five of the items as it was passed to the reader). Of the five selected, the reader is to finish each phrase with what he would do as a member of that profession. Then pass it on to three other bloggers.

Right. Additions in bold below.

If [Reader] could be a scientist // If [Reader] could be a farmer
If [Reader] could be a musician // If [Reader] could be a doctor
If [Reader] could be a painter // If [Reader] could be a gardener
If [Reader] could be a missionary // If [Reader] could be a chef
If [Reader] could be an architect // If [Reader] could be a linguist
If [Reader] could be a psychologist // If [Reader] could be a librarian
If [Reader] could be an athlete // If [Reader] could be a lawyer
If [Reader] could be an innkeeper // If [Reader] could be a professor
If [Reader] could be a writer // If [Reader] could be a backup dancer
If [Reader] could be a llama-rider // If [Reader] could be a bonnie pirate
If [Reader] could be a midget stripper // If [Reader] could be a proctologist
If [Reader] could be a TV-Chat Show host // If [Reader] could be a pariah
If [Reader] could be an actor // If [Reader] could be a judge
If [Reader] could be a Jedi // If [Reader] could be a mob boss
If [Reader] could be a backup singer // If [Reader] could be a CEO
If [Reader] could be a movie reviewer // If [Reader] could be a monkeyโ€™s uncle
If [Reader] could be a bible archaeologist //If [Reader] could be a househusband
If [Reader] could be a lifeguard //If [Reader] could be a comic artist
If [Reader] could be a stockbroker//If [Reader] could be a travel writer
If [Reader] could be a food reviewer //If [Reader] could be a politician
If [Reader] could be a male underwear model //If [Reader] could be a fashion designer
If [Reader] could be an game designer // If [Reader] could be a dog-trainer
If [Reader] could be a Transformer // If [Reader] could be a computer virus
If [Reader] could be a porn star // If [Reader] could be another blogger
if [Reader] could be a grain of sand // If [Reader] could be a fly on a wall

Alrighty then. Here we go.

If I could be a missionary, I’d just tell everyone to forget about it and live life without worries – ‘cos you’re all doomed anyway!! Muahahahahah!

If I could be a llama-rider, I’d dismount and get myself a car.

If I could be a Jedi, you’d be dead. No, really. I’m not kidding. The Force is not to be trifled with!!

If I could be a CEO, I’d leak to the press about a new ultra-high-tech device my company has developed that would change the face of the planet (along with the moon, Mars and some say Uranus), watch the share price hit the stratosphere, dump my stock, bag the cash and bail on the company leaving a giant mess on my second-in-command’s hands! Hah! That’s what you get for taking my parking spot, Mr. I-Wanna-Be-CEO-Too! ๐Ÿ˜›

If I could be a lifeguard, I’d watch people drown. A lot. And enjoy it. And laugh when they take me away in straitjackets: “HAHAH! Told y’all you shouldn’t be running near the pool! TOLD YA!!”

Now to target 3 other poor unsuspecting bloggers.

1. Jess (as revenge for the musical meme + she’s pissed off at Maybank)
2. Andreas (cos I’m still waiting for my Cappucino)
3. Bawang Merah (cos he’s a RED. Walk On!)

Now, go away and let me get back to work.

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3 thoughts on “The IF I COULD BE… meme”

  1. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr…………… whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy????????????????!!!!!!!!!!
    on the other hand your answers seem to reflect a lot of cynicism. ๐Ÿ˜› gotta watch out when u become CEO.

  2. Ah Jedi. What kuci kraut of a numbskulls they are.

    Come look for me when you secure a place in the new Jedi Knights order.

    Sign,
    Darth Mucus.

  3. Arrhgghghghghghg. Noooooo. Okay, will do so tomorrow. But wait, until I see you over Cappucino. And I hope you will look as handsome as Jess is pretty ๐Ÿ™‚

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